Thy Enemy – Feature Length Script Review (Available for Production!)


“After learning his estranged brother is a rogue spy, a disgraced FBI cadet becomes a fugitive to stop his sibling from detonating an experimental weapon in New York City.”

If you’re a movie aficionado (of course you are!), betcha you’ve seen at least one of the successful action films released in 2015. Among them:

The Martian, Jurassic World, Avengers: Age of Ultron, and Furious 7 have been top money-makers, with Mission: Impossible — Rogue Nation, Ant-Man, San Andreas, Mad Max: Fury Road, and Spy not far behind.

Movies like these fill theaters because audiences love them. To exploding, earth shattering pieces.

And what’s not to love with scenes like these…?

Chases, explosions, suspense, and surprises. Break out the FX and CGI! They’re blockbusters that demand repeat attendance. For how could you possibly catch all the whiz, bang, and boom in one viewing?

Then there’s the franchise potential. Cha-ching!

The nature of a well-made action movie is to plunk a likable hero into a roller-coaster-ride environment demanding physical prowess and intelligence – throwing insurmountable obstacles in their path. Crafted

for both entertainment and empathy, the hero’s onscreen journey invokes responses across the board of human emotion: shock, fear, horror, awe and happiness. Then physical reactions grip you as well: from misty-eyed/choked-up to laughing and cheering. There go the credits. Let’s see this again. Wahoo!

Well, move over Ethan Hunt. ‘Cause there are two new heroes in town.

Their names are Nathan and Wyatt Crane.

Brett Martin’s riveting action story, Thy Enemy, opens with the breathless action in full play.

The “magnetic” and mystifying figure that fills the screen: a fearless Skydiver inside the empty bay of an F-117 Nighthawk jet – clad in “form-fitting body armor…fingerless gloves…heavy boots, and knee pads”.

The Bomb-drop hatches open suddenly, sucking roaring air inside.

“The Skydiver sprints the length of the fuselage…dives into the roaring darkness,” a gut-wrenching free fall “through the starry night.”

Gotta be one of our heroes, right? Not so fast. It’s the bad guy. Hold on there. She’s a… girl. A villainess extraordinaire by the name of Dietrich. An efficient and highly-trained Ukrainian operative, Dietrich’s on her way to an unfriendly meet-and-greet with a C-17 military jet.

Unfortunately for the soldiers guarding the jet’s important cargo (plus a veteran pilot at the helm) our bad girl’s bringing real bad news. Alarms blare. Explosions coalesce and down the plane – into “a blooming fireball.”

So who’s our hero? Nathan?

Well, he’s nowhere in the vicinity of Dietrich’s handiwork. “Sporting a designer suit” and representing the International Atomic Energy Agency (IAEA), Nathan’s visiting an old friend in a secretive facility on the Franco/Swiss border. He may not be playing Dietrich’s game, but Nathan’s on an equally important mission: to examine (and maybe steal) a valuable and potentially devastating new weapon.

Is Nathan a good guy, or are his nefarious motives aligned with Dietrich’s plans?

Enter Nathan’s 20 years younger brother – FBI Trainee Wyatt Crane.

So maybe Wyatt’s our true hero…

He and older brother Nathan have a long, competitive family history – which is far from positive. Wyatt’s a green FBI cadet. And, according to Nathan, he can’t do anything right.

So it’s not surprising when Wyatt flubs an FBI lesson – almost destroying an expensive obstacle course. Which makes his law enforcement career short-lived. Soon, he’s disciplined by Special Agent Benjamin Knowland. A man of action vs. words, Ben cuts to the quick: “You’re through, Crane. Tell me why I should waste my time.”

Taking refuge in a bar, Wyatt receives an unexpected phone call from his long-lost brother Nathan. Appearing to make amends after an eight-year bout of silence, Nathan asks Wyatt to fly to New York City instantly. “I need to see you…I need your help.” Then Nathan hangs up. Without an explanation as to why.

Wyatt heads to nearby Dulles Airport. By the next day, he’s on the red-eye at JFK. While waiting for his baggage, Wyatt’s intercepted by a handful of TSA Agents, led by Special Agent In-Charge Lau. The guards handcuff Wyatt and haul him off to an interrogation room. Lau’s particularly interested in Wyatt’s relationship with Nathan: “Why did you turn your back on a career in the FBI to meet a brother you don’t even like?”

Meanwhile, Nathan’s a no-show at the airport. That promised second phone call has vaporized.

Which is when Ridley Turner arrives. A self-proclaimed colleague/friend of Nathan’s, Ridley provides an explosive diversion, springing Wyatt from custody. “I need to find Nathan just as bad as you do. He’s the only one that can help us now.”

Against his better judgment, Wyatt takes a leap of more than faith – joining alliances with Ridley to hunt down his missing big bro.

Which is when Dietrich surfaces, joined by her “younger, tomboy sexpot” sister Mila. Not to mention a dozen Slavic mercenary partners-in-crime. Clearly, they’re up to no good…

Who’s in cahoots with whom? Have patience, sweet darlings. The details will come in time.

Amidst captivating action, there’s also a sweet love story involving a woman Wyatt meets on his journey. She’s in search of Nathan for her own reasons… a secret motive she refuses to tell.

Audiences love rowdy and wild action movies. Thy Enemy is all that and more. It’s also about “Characters.” That’s what differentiates a movie like Battleship from Mission Impossible or Bourne.

Imagine: an entertaining non-stop action pitting two brothers with sibling-rivalry issues against a diabolical bad girl you love to hate – against the backdrop of potential worldwide destruction. The fate of the world will depend on our hero’s success. But the success of this script in the box office? That’s a clearly win-win fate!

The question remains: Will the ultimate hero be Nathan or Wyatt Crane?

With intrigue and action around every corner, Thy Enemy is an invigorating ride from beginning to end. It’s the perfect screenplay for a big budget director to knock clear out of the park!

Pages: 111

Budget: Big. Several strong lead actors, male and female, many extras and plenty of stunt work. Locations are simple enough to stage, but the FX/CGI demands hands-on attention for excellence. This film is destined to be a blockbuster! The kind you see on opening night!

About the Reviewer: California über reader/reviewer KP Mackie is working on an animated feature.

About the Writer: Brett Martin is an unrepped screenwriter and freelance reader living in Los Angeles.  He sold an action/thriller to Quixotic Productions, which is owned by Brett Stimely (Watchmen, Transformers 3). He’s recently finalized a tentpole action feature & a brand new bi-weekly cartoon web series, Robots Love Movies, as he continues his quest to be a professional writer.

Want to read Thy Enemy (for option or sale)?

Of course you do!

Because we at STS are “good guys”, we don’t want to ruin opening night for anyone – so we’re keeping plot spoilers out of the public eye.

But email Brett Martin at soleil.rouge13 “AT” gmail.

Because Thy Enemy is fated to explode into life!



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